A Bitter Bite from Twilight

I see myself as an ardent reader who is up-to-date with the best (and hottest) works of literature that ever hit the shelves. I usually make frequent forays to different bookshops and booksales to keep up with all things literary. But on top of all these, I am a passionate vampire literature bibliophile. I was Lestat de Lioncourt's lover before Harry Potter came along. I was Anne Rice's faithful disciple before Jo even finished writing The Sorcerer's Stone. And imagine my surprise when one of my college friends gushed about Twilight, THE vamp-lit by Stephenie Meyer, a book I haven't even heard of.

I was undeniably and utterly intrigued. A new vamp-lit, you say? Well, I do love you, Lestat, Marius and Khayman, my dahlings, but I must move on to...ahem...greener pastures and newer conquests. And so, I rushed to the bookstore and (miraculously) found a copy.

Somewhere at the back of my mind, my non-existent conscience kept muttering that I would be terribly disappointed with my new purchase, because it is, primarily, a romance lit. Like a normal human being, I ignored my (again, non-existent) conscience. Halfway into the novel, I can't help but feel a sense of foreboding, an unshakeable feeling that the book is just that, full of dark romance, perfect knights-in-shining-armor and forbidden love. Disappointed, I am, yet somehow I expected it. I am not going to delve into the most intricate technicalities of the novel since I have better things to do (i.e. write my English 12 term paper, yet I don't know why I'm wasting my precious time with this), but let me just give some of the things that have been persistently bugging me since I've finished the book.

I was, at first, wondering how this became so popular among young adults since this generation is not known to be fans of the supernatural and fantastical. I know that vamp-lit would have appealed to the more mature readers and not to a younger (female) audience who rant and rave about Gossip Girl, but after finishing the book, I understood.

Allow me to raise my points on two, different bases. Academically, there's nothing much laudable with Meyer's work. Sure, she was able to establish impressive contrasts between downright opposite variables, e.g. Phoenix and Forks, man and vampire, and was able to paint an alluring picture of light in darkness that tickled my imagination, but Meyer must have been using Twilight to practice her descriptive-narrative writing style, because there is an omnipresence of excessive descriptions that, ultimately, subjugates the more critical elements of plot development. There is a recurrence of how prodigiously perfect Edward is to the point of exaltation, and trust me, it gets aggravating after a while. I was saying to myself, "Yeah, yeah, Edward's scorchingly hot and could give Lestat a run for his money, but do you have to rub it in and repeat it every goddamn page?"

Another anomalous element that I've spotted is the conflicting developments made on Bella's character. She was made out to be an awkward, run-of-the-mill teenager, yet she somehow managed to ensnare the hearts of the boys of Forks. Not to mention the hot yet frostily unattainable vampire. Was this an attempt of Meyer's to incorporate a touch of realism in her characters and, in due course, develop Bella's characterization? If so, then she failed miserably in that area, because her stab at realistic characters ended up in quasi-pragmatism.

On a lighter yet not necessarily positive note, the relationship of Bella and Edward disturbed me greatly. I don't know if it's just me, but Edward's character practically consumes that of Bella's, to the point that she cannot and WILL not live without Edward's presence in her life. It became obssessive to a subtle point that Bella's existence depended on Edward. At one point in the book, though, I had this impression that Edward was Bella's father with the way he steers her to the right direction.

To all Twilight fans, don't fret, the book isn't wholly devoid of commendable points. Primarily, I would have to laud the nearly-imperceptible theme on morality that runs its course through Edward Cullen. This is most perceivable in his entirely apparent reluctance to turn Bella into a vampire, and his relinquishment of human prey, along with his "family". There are more impressive complexities that Edward's character encompasses, such as his inner struggle conceived from his awareness of the inherent danger on Bella's life. Anytime, he could lose control of the blood lust that he feels in the presence of Bella, and add the band of vampires who want Bella's blood into the mix and you get a histrionic amalgam of suspense and romance. The sexual tension is so palpable, I could almost taste it.

Honestly, I enjoyed it. I enjoyed lambasting it. It was thrilling and had the "danger" factor in abundant heaps, and offers a fast-paced turn of events (so fast it elapses the character and plot development, but that's beside the point).

I think that I lost a couple of IQ points by the end of the novel. It's no Shakespeare, and you don't even have to be an educated reader to appreciate this. My only advice is, don't think, just enjoy, and you'll probably forget that you squandered your precious, hard-earned moolah on this not-really-thought-provoking romance tale. It is, as they say, a vampire story for people who don't like vampire stories.

A part of me still can't understand how this managed to crawl its way up to the Times list, but predominantly, I know that it's because of the colossal popularity (and profit) that it managed to draw from millions of love-struck teenagers that jumped mindlessly onto the bandwagon. And unbelievably, yet predictably, Twilight is still garnering more fans by the minute. Just wait for that movie adaptation with Robert Pattinson as Edward. I bet my brother's balls that nearly every seat in every theater in every country will be occupied by a squealing/giggling/lovestruck female and/or an unwilling/reluctant/embarrassed person of the male species forced to take said female on a date.

And all I can say is, "Good luck, boys. At least you can drag your ladies to the next Jessica Alba movie without them complaining."